A day in the life of an ileostomy recovering from surgery

1. Check to see if Kitty is up. If she is not, wake her up, obviously.
2. Drink some chocolate soy milk to get the day going.
3. Check to see how Mr. Stoma is doing. Does he need some attention?
4. Drink a 350 calorie milk chocolate protein shake. Magic in a bottle! Plus, that's the best flavor. 

5. Check my email. 1000 people have not emailed me? How rare. Spend 30 minutes keeping someone company while they are at work by gchatting them. 
6. Eat some goldfish. The current goal is six servings a day.
7. Write some old fashioned letters because I am the one last person in the world who has time, then stop half way through and lose them. It's the thought that counts.
8. Drink four cups of water in row because I forgot to drink enough.
9. Think about practicing violin.
10. Read some news headlines.
11. Eat some brownies.
12. Wait for people to call me. It's awkward to call other people because they probably have things to do and will be busy. Better to wait.
13. Eat a sandwich.
14. Read a chapter of a book that will make me feel smarter, preferably written by a famous dead person.
15. Drink another 350 calorie protein shake. Mmm so good!
16. Watch a bad summer TV show. Wonder where the last forty minutes of my life went.
17. Clean my room badly. Every day I get it messy again because I am lazy. It was also probably never clean in the first place.
18. How are the goldfish doing? They probably need to be eaten.
19. How is Mr. Stoma? He is usually quiet in the morning so he doesn't need attention until the early afternoon.
20. Think about practicing violin.
21. Study for the GRE for 20 minutes. Don't mention how obvious my dearth of vocabulary is to my mom, who will remind me how lazy I am. "You're so well read but your vocabulary isn't very good! Do you even look up words you don't know?" No...who does that?
22. Look at news headlines again.
23. Where has Kitty been all this time? She definitely has been up to no good. She could use a walk around the garden, a tummy rub, a brushing or just some loving. 

Kitty was in the bathtub! One of her favorite hangouts.

24. Eat some milanos.
25. Time for the daily cup of ice cream.
26. Drink some water.
27. Errand with mom. Too bad I just drank so much water because I now have to pee every ten minutes.
28. Mr. Stoma has gotten carried away. Afternoons and evenings are busy times for Mr. Stoma.
29. Worry about pouchitis. Find some worrisome blogs about pouchitis.
30. Drink some water. 
31. Find some interesting facts, such as: Dwight Eisenhower had Crohn's disease and had emergency surgery for an obstruction during his first term! If he, a bald man with Crohn's, survived being president for eight years, then I, with a nice head of hair and no Crohn's, can survive too.
32. Drink another protein shake. I mean business.
33. Have awkward phone conversation with a friend. What have I done today, you may ask? I don't know where to begin.....
34. Drink some water.
35. Check on the cat I am growing:

36. Read some news headlines. It would suck to have UC or Crohn's in Yemen.
37. Skype someone.
38. Mr. Stoma needs attention.
39. Cat has grown

Note the deformed face

40. Kitty is probably lonely. Let’s play, Kitty! I don’t care if you are 95 in human years. Mammals should be friends.  

Kitty, how could that position be comfortable? Stop getting your fur everywhere. Why are you doing that? The mysteries of feline behavior.

41. Where did the day go? It's already dinnertime. Not hungry but priorities are priorities. Some pasta with tomato sauce would hit the spot, as it has practically every night since surgery. Luckily, I live in the New World, where tomatoes can be found in abundance.
42. Show growing cat to Kitty. She knows what is going on. She starts drinking the water, the life force of the growing cat, to eliminate the competition for my attention.

43. Parents are home.
44. Eat some milanos and finish the goldfish.
45. Time to read, or just think about how rewarding reading could be.
46. Time to check on Mr. Stoma before bed. Where is Kitty? Oh yes, waiting for me. We read together for an hour before sleep. 

She really sleeps like this

All in all, a better day than days were for a long time, and one day in a string of better days that just keep getting better.